Posts Tagged ‘Health’

Drug Testing For Public Assistance? How About Drug Testing Our Legislators?

September 19, 2013 4 comments

As of April, at least 8 states have instituted some form of mandatory drug testing for those who are in need of some manner of public assistance. In addition, another 29 states (mostly red states) have introduced legislation to introduce mandatory drug testing as part of their public assistance programs. I came across this article yesterday: The Myth of Welfare and Drug Use – The Daily Beast.  Think mandatory drug testing is saving us money? Check out this passage about drug testing in Utah:

The myth of welfare recipients spending their benefits on drugs is just that—a myth. And indeed, in Utah, only 12 people out of 466—or 2.5 percent—showed evidence of drug use after a mandatory screening. The total cost to the state was $25,000, or far more than the cost of providing benefits to a dozen people. The only thing “gained” from mandatory drug testing is the humiliation of desperate people.


 As tax payers, we pay thousands in order to catch and deny benefits to a little under three percent of those who are in need of government assistance. It would be cheaper to the public if we just paid out the damned assistance, and invested, oh, I don’t know, maybe some jobs programs? That would make too much sense though. I’m guessing that the Republican state legislators that voted in this law are probably in the back pockets of big pharmaceuticals. You know, the companies that make and sell these expensive drug tests. It’s just another example of how the “Haves” make billions from the debasement of the unfortunate. This is right up there with private run prisons, which are over run with people who don’t belong there. It’s about the money. Ya dig? Think about it: all of the clinics and doctors and lab techs that are needed to conduct these test – who foots the bill? The government of course. Who collects the money? Big medical and pharmaceutical corporations, an industry that has a huge lobby in state and federal government. It’s the perfect scam, almost as perfect as the car dealer wanting to charge you extra to put undercoating on your new car.

In other words, we’re paying for something that is simply not fucking needed. You know who needs to pee in a cup? Republicans: they live in such a world that is so far removed, that they must be on something good. How else can their collective behaviors be explained?

How To Have a Bad Morning

1. Over sleep.
2. Lock yourself out of the house.
3. Ring door bell for 10 minutes, hoping your wife wakes up, while trying to nudge stray cat from your front door with your foot.
4. Hopelessly stare at watch as you realize how late for work you are.
5. Find window that will open. Note to yourself how small it is in proportion to your fat ass.
6. Fit fat ass through window anyway.
7. Knock every thing off desk in front of window.
8. Fall off desk, fat ass first.
9. Grab ibuprofen for broken ass pain.
10. Scald mouth with searing hot coffee while taking ibuprofen for broken ass pain.

Sleep Study or Secret Conservative Conspiracy?

January 17, 2012 8 comments

What an Unhappy Camper Looks Like

Now that I’m a borderline old man, my health is becoming a concern. I’m trying to take better care of myself as I get older, because at some point in the last few years I realized I’m not the indestructible tank that I was 20 years ago. Part of that process is trying to figure out why I’m always tired. After eliminating a few options such as anemia, my partner suggested I may have sleep apnea, which makes sense because I snore – loudly, and she has witnessed the stoppage of my breathing more than a few times.

Last night I went to the sleep disorder clinic in order to get my sleeping pattern analyzed. But was it really a sleep disorder clinic? When I first walked into my room the tv was already on: Tuned to Fox News! I’m thinking the clinic is a front for a conservative brain washing lab run by the Koch Brothers.

I played their little game though; they hooked me up to electrodes and monitored my sleep, all the while trying to push conservative ideologies into my dreams. I didn’t yield; I walked out of there this morning with the same leftist leanings that makes Karl Marx look like Ayn Rand.

Btw, did Rick Perry win the debate last night? I sure hope so! He has a lot of ideas that will restore our country to the greatness of the George W Bush years! What? NOOOOOOOOOO!

Excuse me, I need to watch a Michael Moore film- right away!

My 12 Hour War With Cancer: A Kind Of Funny Story!

September 20, 2011 8 comments

Many of you know that I have Bi-Polar disorder and I’ve been taking medication for a little over a year. In my case, along with the mood disorder comes an extreme obsession with death. Before I started the medication, the previous 30 to 40 years of my life involved non stop thoughts about suicide. I would spend hours of my day thinking of different ways to kill myself, as well as day dreaming about the reactions it would cause from the people I know. My obsession is what finally drove me into the hospital last year, and as a result, somebody finally figured out what was wrong with me, and got me on the right meds.

After I started my medication, the pendulum swung the other way; now I have an unhealthy fear of death. Sometimes it gets so bad that I can’t sleep at night, because I’m afraid I’ll wake up the next morning dead. I obsess, about the when and the how, and my loved ones that I would be leaving behind, as well as what I would be missing. I mean c’mon, the next season of Dexter is about to start, and it’s football season. I just simply do not have time to die at this point!

Early last week, I had my quarterly check up with my mental health provider. As a precaution, she told me to get a blood test in order to make sure that my medication was not having an adverse effect on my blood sugar and cholesterol. I go the next day to get the blood drawn, and by that night I’m getting a somewhat frantic voice mail from her telling me that there are “some values to the results that she doesn’t understand,” and that I should get into my doctor right away. Of course my mind immediately kicks into panic mode, and I start thinking that this is the beginning of the end for me. The other thought that occurred to me is “why in the fuck is my psychiatrist leaving a panicky call about test results on the voice mail of someone who is constantly obsessed about death? I mean, am I wrong here? What the fuck was she thinking? Leaving me a voice mail that my blood test came back weird, is like leaving Michele Bachmann a voice mail that an army of gay atheist unemployed socialists are on their way to her house to fuck her husband and raid her fridge. Panic is a guaranteed reaction.

The next morning, I make an appointment with my doctor, and I have my psychiatrist fax me the test results so I can take them in with me. At this point my morbid fear of death is getting the best of me, so it’s off to the internet we go, in order to try to make some sense of the results. Really bad idea! After checking out some medical websites, all indications were that I had Leukemia. What the fuck. I immediately go into full blown panic attack mode, which did not make for a very pleasant evening. My emotions got the best of me, and I couldn’t help but get pissed that I was going to die before Bengals owner Mike Brown does.

After all this, it turns out that there was nothing in the blood screen that indicates cancer. My doctor told me that I have a less than one percent chance of having it, and that the test results were an indication that I more likely have some condition that is related to my anemia, which I’ve had all my life. The end result was a drawing of 6 more vials of blood, and I’m waiting for the results of that screen. I also got the “BTW, you need to quit smoking and lose some weight” lecture, because it just wouldn’t be a productive visit to the doctor without getting that talk. Of course, after I left the doctor, my partner and I had a huge laugh over the whole over reacting to the blood test results thing.

I’ve re learned a couple of lessons from this; First off, never look up your test results on the internet on your own. Hell, if you Google the word Anemia, you’ll get a hundred thousand results that are guaranteed to scare the holy shit out of you. Second, I seriously have to get over this morbid obsession with death. I’m only 46 years old, and I’m guessing I still have a lot left in the tank. We’re all born with an expiration date: That’s just the way it is; there is absolutely no point in worrying about what I can’t control. I have plenty of other shit to worry about, like finances, or my job, or my psychotic son finding his way back to my house and killing me. Wait, what? Ah fuck!

Death By Moo Juice!

July 7, 2011 7 comments
A Dairy Crest Semi-Skimmed Milk Bottle.

Image via Wikipedia

My thanks to Tori at Anytime Yoga for her winning topic suggestion of how consuming dairy can have adverse health affects. If you haven’t checked out her blog yet please do!

Without further adieu, I bring you

Death By Moo Juice

We’ve all grown up with the myth that dairy products are good for us. We’ve been hammered over the head countless times that we need to consume milk and cheese in order to get calcium, which promotes bone growth and stability. However, recent studies have shown that calcium ingested from dairy does not promote bone growth and stability, and actually leeches calcium from our system.

What we need to realize is that our bodies were not made to consume products made from cow’s milk. After the breast feeding stage of infancy, our body loses lactase, which is needed to break down the sugars lactose and galactose that are found in cow’s milk. Our body doesn’t need or want dairy products. In fact ingesting cow’s milk can create a myriad of health issues including:

 Heart disease
 Diabetes
 Prostate cancer
 Ovarian cancer- In fact Women who consume dairy on a daily basis run a 73% higher risk of developing ovarian cancer.
 Leukemia
 Bronchitis
 Emphysema
 Asthma
 Pneumonia
 Influenza
 Nephritis ( Inflammation of the Kidneys)
Irritable Bowel Syndrome
Crohn’s disease
 Immune system disorders
 Reproductive system disorders

How are all these issues related to consumption of dairy? Well here’s the really gross part. Here’s what’s present in our dairy, regular and organic:

 59 active bovine hormones
 Massive amounts of allergens
 Fat
 Cholesterol
 Herbicides
 Pesticides
 Over 200 times the safe level of dioxins
 52 types of antibiotics
 Blood
 Pus
 Feces
 Bacteria- One bacteria in particular, Mycobacterium Para tuberculosis is passed through dairy products and has found to be a major cause of Crohn’s in many cases.
 Viruses
 Recombinant bovine growth hormone (rBGH) – This is found in traditional dairy farms; it is given to the cows in order to produce more milk.
Polychlorinated biphenyls– A major link to cancer.

And if you think that just kicking the milk habit is enough, guess again. Cheese is ten times more concentrated than milk, while Ice Cream is 12 times more concentrated. Stay away from the butter too; it contains 21 times more toxic levels than milk.

Dairy is not only bad for our health from ingestion; it puts an incredible strain on our environment as well. In the United States, it’s estimated that there are 9.2 million cows used for dairy production. Each cow consumes 330 pounds of feed, as well as 33 gallons of water a day. Since what goes in must come out, the result is 275 pounds of urine and feces per day, resulting in 923 billion pounds of untreated pollution that finds its way to our water supply. In addition, dairy cows emit 1 billion pounds of methane per year into our atmosphere, so yes, cow farts are considered to be a huge factor in global warming.

In one of my posts Wednesday, I jokingly referred to Elsie the Cow as a poison spewing hussy. It turns out that I wasn’t wrong.

This Week’s Winner of Pick Your Topic Tuesday Is:

June 22, 2011 3 comments

It’s Wednesday night, which means it’s time to pick this week’s winner of Pick Your Topic Tuesday. Once again, I want to thank everyone who posted a suggestion; as always, they were brilliant! As some of you may know, the panel that picks the winner every week consists of me and the groundhog that lives in my back yard. Since I used my right to eminent domain last week, and over ruled the groundhog’s pick of topics, I decided to defer to him this week. Much like me, the groundhog feels strongly about women’s issues,so his choice was a relatively easy one. With that in mind, this week’s winner of Pick Your Topic Tuesday is:

Tori from Anytime Yoga, with her suggestion of “Advances in endometriosis management/treatment within the last 10 years.”

Endometriosis is a very painful condition in which the tissue that normally grows inside the uterine walls begins to grow outside of the uterus. Many years ago, the only treatment for it was a hysterectomy. However there have been many treatments developed in the last decade. I will go in depth on these treatments in my post, which will be published no later than Friday. As always, I will attribute the post suggestion to Tori, complete with her blogging information.

Thanks again to everyone who contributed this week!

Grandmother Reclaimed:Featured Poem From Carving Out a Voice

February 4, 2011 1 comment
Rest home for seniors in Český Těšín, Czech Re...

Image via Wikipedia

Grandmother Reclaimed is one in a series of poems about my partner’s  86 year old schizophrenic grandmother who has been institutionalized for most of her adult life. Her condition worsened when she was lobotomized in the 1950’s, a barbaric procedure used on the mentally ill back in the day.

My partner began to take an active role in her grandma’s life shortly after we got together. Since then she has moved her to a nursing home only a few miles from our house and grandma is now a cherished part of our lives.

My partner has gone to great lengths to research and come to understand schizophrenia and how it affects grandma. She has talked about one day writing a book about it based on grandma’s life. I would love for her to do it. Her writing has always been meaningful and a pleasure to read. This poem is no different; it’s an honor and a privilege to watch her grow as a writer 🙂